“What I’m looking for” – Are you still looking for something?

「Apple-jeans」     2020  Tempera on canvas  F6

井上陽水の「探しものは何ですか」ではないがまだまだ探す気ですかの心境を味わい続けている見つかるはずもない「精神的な」探し物ではなく物理的な「電源ケーブル」を捜索を諦めてネットで新品を購入するかまだまだ探す気ですかの二択というわびしい話

今日はある展覧会の関係者だけのオープニング・パーティが午後4時から私も出品していて行くつもりではいたのだが、morning、昨日からの頭痛が少しあり「風邪気味かな?」と思ったので遠慮することにした。And、雨戸の修理。couldn't do it。それからケーブル探し何かを探すということは結局は片付けをすることにもなり大規模な掃除に。But、見つからないその間に昼食を摂り魚だったので一部を時々庭に寝そべりにくる猫(首輪をつけている)にやり食うところを見たりしながらケーブルを探す

Actually、もう3日も探し続けている探す範囲は限定されている(それが思い込みなのかも)ので一箇所あたりの捜索時間は相当になるはずだ自分の顔のホクロ探しよりも慎重(なはず)だ半年前そこに置いた時点から「ここはマズいかも」との不安だけがズバリ的中した感じ

そろそろ諦めて新品を買うかまだ探すかの選択が迫られてくるタイミングだ嫌だなー何でこんな時に雨戸が壊れなくちゃならないの!そういえばインチサイズのマットがたくさん余っていたなあ–とか何でこんな時に思いついちゃうんだろうかな

The “power” of music、Art、The “power” of sports

"Western Pear" 29Jan’20 Watercolor F6

There is a musician named Ryuichi Sakamoto.。Even if you don't say you're a former YMO member,、Probably more people know。the other day、Read the interview article with him in Asahi Shimbun (electronic version)、I completely sympathized。

The word "power of music"、He says he doesn't like the way he says it.。encouraging people with music、It is true that it has the power to heal、He says he feels uncomfortable with that kind of way of saying things.。Although I don't say it clearly、The way you say it is kind of political.、I smell the danger of being socially oriented.、I felt that it meant。have a deep sympathy for that sense of smell。

Just as Wagner's heroic sound was exploited to the fullest by the Nazis.、Even in Japan, popular music is widely sung as ``military songs.''、Many people point out that it was used to glorify war.。Also、He also ``doesn't like'' high school students saying ``I want to impress them'' (through sports, etc.).。It's good if the recipient is impressed.、Isn't it arrogant for the performer to say "to impress"?、It is also called。I also deeply sympathize with this。Incidentally,、In particular, young athletes in sports often say the word "gratitude" over and over again.、I feel a strong sense of discomfort。Isn't that an appropriate word to use when you're retiring?。

Facilities and subsidies for athletes to compete、I feel grateful for the many tangible and intangible supports I receive.、Of course it can't be bad。But、素直な気持ちだけではない、I feel the ``pressure'' of having to say something.。without those words、I know that there will be various forms of bashing later.、This is because both players and officials feel strongly.。Unconsciously, we say, ``Because they're using our tax dollars.''、I feel that I deserve gratitude.、I realized that the pressure was on me from above.、we have to be more careful。And、I am well aware of that、There is also a dark power that is secretly used.、must be conscious at the same time、It is a sport that is firmly connected to the essence of current sports.。

power of music、power of art、power of sport。That's、People are not diverse (actually, this word has become something I don't particularly want to hear these days)、If it works in the direction of flattening (the words "empathy" and "impression" can also have a suspicious smell here)、It's real music、Art、Stripping away the power of sports、transform into something distorted、It can also be a type of cancer.。Ryuichi says, ``What I'm doing is fun in itself.''。That’s important.”。yes。just by looking at its existence、Taxes have already paid for themselves.。

A song for hundreds of people

"Western Pear" 2020、1 Watercolor・F6

10almost a year ago、started writing haiku。I wish I had something that I could call a hobby.、Because I thought。It doesn't cost much money、All I have to think about is 17 characters.、I wonder if even I, who is quite slow, can do it.、(Like many people) It was because of impure feelings.。In order not to give up too soon、I was asked to teach at a (too small) haiku meeting.。There is a haiku meeting once a month.、It was the 100th anniversary at the end of last year.。At first, I wanted to try various things.、smug、Create many phrases that are quite biased、I incurred the displeasure of the members.。

Lately, I've been feeling like I can't say much with 17 letters.。Just in case、Since it is a traditional haiku, seasonal words are included.。With this, I spend about five characters.。There are only 12 characters left、It takes about five characters to write the name of a specific thing or some description.。Convey your mood and intention with the remaining seven letters、I started to feel like there was no way I could do it.。Certainly a masterpiece、There are some ``famous haiku'' that have such depth and breadth that it is hard to believe that they are made up of only 17 characters.。But、for ordinary people like me、No matter what I do, I imitate others、It cannot help but become a simile.。

So if it's a tanka with 31 characters,、There is no need for seasonal words.、I thought I could use the whole thing for myself.、I started reading a book of modern tanka poems.。It's definitely much more interesting then。However, I have come to understand that it is more than four times as difficult to create a character with 7 characters and 31 characters.。This is a huge burden both time-wise and mentally.。On the other hand, haiku is still continuing.。This is why、Sometimes I compose tanka、If only the first 17 characters are considered a haiku,、I thought that I could kill two birds with one stone.。

I didn't think it would go that well、It was as expected。Important points even in tanka、What I want to say is the second half.。But、Then I noticed one thing。短歌の前半つまり大したことではないところそこは風景や情景といういわば「背景」を説明する部分まさに「花鳥風月」の部分じゃないか。I see、俳句というのは大事なところをすっぱり切り捨て七文字じゃとても言い切れないからと読む人に思いっきり丸投げしてしまうブラック商法なのだなと-ここでやっと「百人一首」に繋がるのだが王朝時代のゆったりした叙景の「コツ」を覚えるには万葉から新古今集あたりまでの名作がたった百首に絞り込まれた「百人一首」が一番手っ取り早いのではないかというおよそ趣味的ではない発想で読んでみることにしたのだった。However、どうもこれがいろいろと後を引きそうな気配濃厚である意味困っているところです