Month: January 2024

Spring is coming

"Cherry blossoms and merry-go-round" watercolor

on YouTube、I started consciously devoting my time and energy to、A whole year and a half has passed。For about a year before that, I had little interest in YouTube itself.、I was told that I would probably need it later.、I needed to quickly get used to the iPad.、draw on ipad、I will make a simple video of the process and upload it.、I passed by just practicing.。

I want to be able to make "normal videos"、During the past year and a half, when I “became more conscious”、Number of views increased from 3000 to 60000、The number of subscribers ranges from around 30 to over 600.、Approximately 20 times more。When I first started, I would have been happy with this number and thought it was amazing.。But realistically、This means "You are not suitable for YouTube"、It seems that the number is equivalent to a declaration.。It's true that it takes 18 months to multiply by 20 times.、It simply means that you only increase by what you do.。people calling people、That means it has to be a so-called acceleration curve.。

What it takes to be “successful” on YouTube、in my case、Apparently we need 100 to 200 times more views and subscribers than we have now! How distant is that number?、I'm starting to understand more and more now.。
If you can say it's a hobby、It doesn't really matter though、Is it of any use in the classroom?、I was thinking vaguely.、考え方を変えなければならないことになりました。consumption of time and energy、It's too big。I want to convey the joy of drawing、That's what I was thinking、For that reason, I don't lose time to draw pictures myself.、Eyes get worse (perhaps this is due to aging)、Because sometimes I feel depressed.、It's literally putting the cart before the horse.。

Should I quit YouTube after I started it?。Still a little、I feel like it's a waste。What is “success”?、もともとできるとは思っていなかったけれど、It's not quite "useful" yet.、Isn't there room to make use of it?、How inexperienced、さらに深みにはまりそうな気もしますし。
　しばらく気分転換が必要かもしれません。It's still winter according to the calendar、It's the first day of spring in a few days.。First, let's draw some cherry blossoms.、自分を楽しませてやろうと思っているところです。

I was moved in my dream

Drawing cherry blossoms - Idea sketch

Still, for some reason, something like the "weight" of the work、3young black man、sketchbook in hand、ボールペン（たぶん）で絵を描いています。If you just look there、Looks like America、I heard somewhere that ``Let's draw the entrance to the Shuto Expressway tunnel.''、Or maybe “TOKYO”。(Why are you black?、I can't explain it because it happened in a dream.。Maybe、Maybe it reflects my own biases.、We will try to recreate the dream as faithfully as possible.)

Apparently the three of them are on a trip.、It doesn't seem like a rich "sightseeing trip" at all.。With nothing to do、Because there's nowhere to go、結果としてぶらぶらと「旅行」になっている様子なんです。3people are、それぞれちょっとずつ歳が離れているらしく、Is the oldest man the leader? It looks like、just age、not、A little tall too。But、That's all、リーダーの「資格」のすべてのようです。He doesn't seem to have a job.。no matter what you do、Even the person himself is aware of it、It's like someone who can't do anything。and、He said it himself。

Someone other than the leader、Looks like he was working on something、Did you get fired?、I don't know if I quit。Anyway, he seems to be unemployed at the moment.。Oh dear、I'm traveling like this、It's probably not a "paid vacation" thing.。The youngest one is still、I have never experienced what is called a job.。Are you a junior high school student?、High school 1 at most，2He looks about the age of a first grader.。Because I met you two、Somehow we started going out together.、That's what it feels like。But、his family is、I wonder what's going on。After all, it's only in a dream、I don't know about his family environment.。I'm sorry。

A “travel” with no destination。Because I don't have any money、just make a joke、There's nothing left to do but make each other laugh、Walk to find the words for that。When you get to a place where you can talk about it、exchange jokes there。that continues forever。
In front of the tunnel、"Because I have nowhere else to go.、Someone said, ``Let's draw a picture here.''。Why、3人ともスケッチブックを持っているのが、It's a wonder in a dream (lol)。3With people、if someone sees、どこを描いているのか分からないほど、It's so bad.。But、それまでのジョークがぱったり消えて、try as hard as one can、I draw innocently.。Because I drew it so seriously、I can't show it to anyone else。At most 3 people、We just use each other as the butt of jokes。

wake up、from my own eyes、I felt something like water flowing (it wasn't pee)、Just in case)。Stay asleep、Try to keep your memory as consistent as possible、Try not to move your body、枕もとのスマートフォンを使って音声メモを採りました。-And now、このバカバカしい夢の話を書いていると、Why、Water is flowing from my eyes again.。Talking about dreams、It's strange。

Channel doesn't match

12I uploaded a video for the first time in a while。If you have time、I would like you to take a look。It’s been 8 days since I last blogged.。I also wrote articles、It wasn't that I wasn't feeling well either.、Up it、I just didn't feel like reading it at all.。

Probably many Japanese people (about 90%?) have it.、I think I also have a very mild case of depression.。I guess that shows up sometimes。Then、There's no point in doing anything、I feel like、I feel like throwing away unfinished business.。On the other hand、"Light" means、listen to good music、When I see a good picture、Immediately I felt energized and said, ``Let's go a little further.''。Then I think I'll stop.。

all last year、作品発表のほとんどの場から身を引きました。Looking at the big picture、わたしはどんどん「社会」から後じさりしているようです。going out into society、Must be involved with society、生きていくことが難しいように世の中は作られているのですが、I want to be alone if possible、I've had this personality since childhood.、It seems like not much has changed。However,、grow a field by yourself、I don't have the knowledge or ability to catch fish and become self-sufficient.、It's just a wish、I really can't live alone。

There is currently a painting class.、That is the point of contact with society.。don't draw、I rarely have contact with people I'm not interested in.。with society、I have never made any effort to expand my contacts outside of painting (I was not proactive even with painting).。In that sense、I am a social “misfit”、I'm positioning myself。I don't think it's "unsuitable" though.、I guess I'm the type who can't bond well (I don't even like the word "bond")。
I don't hate humans by any means, but、I don't like socializing。What I like about Favre and Seaton is、It may be because there is such a thing.。But、I think the number of such people is increasing in Japan.。In other words、On the other hand, while seeking connections with people through SNS etc.、On the other hand, each one wants to be alone.。In that dilemma、Everyone has “mild depression”。In other words、I'm saying that people like me are quite normal.。